Kind of. [ He answered when Rey asked if she was that easy to read. A smile had started to tug at his lips, growing from the smirk he’d held.
There was something about her that brought some of his walls down. He’d met people who were self-centered or suffering abuse, whether at the hand of someone else or self-inflicted. She was neither. The few like her who were attractive and kind were in relationships.
Not that he’d been looking as Diego didn’t feel deserving of filling the void that was loneliness in his life. Sharing his baggage would no doubt drive her off. He’d cut himself off when it felt like too much, more than he could voice without embarrassing himself. Only it didn’t seem she’d judge him for it. He felt guilty as her eyes held back tears similar to his.
And then she shared her baggage that left him unable to speak once she finished. He drank water and heard Grace reminding him to picture the word in his mind to battle his stutter that had a habit of creeping up when emotions got the better of him. It was crazy to find someone who also knew what it was like to have someone die.
He took a deep breath, exhaling like a sigh before giving a response. ]
I’m… sorry. I think you found another jackass. Someone grouchy and hard to read.
[ Except he really wasn’t that hard to read when letting someone in. His emotions were on his sleeves around those he liked, and it was happening with Rey. Brown eyes that could turn dark with anger were soft. Timid. Fearful of not being enough. Diego quickly glanced away and cleared his throat.
He sat up, steeling himself. ]
I don’t know if I’d get you out. I’d stay inside and read too.
[ Yet his shoulders began to slump again as he questioned himself. Was he intentionally trying to sabotage meeting a kindred spirit? No, Diego hadn’t been someone different for Eudora and wouldn’t start now. He couldn’t save her but neither was he responsible for her death. Their relationship failed although his feelings had never changed. ]
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2024-10-11 12:48 am (UTC)There was something about her that brought some of his walls down. He’d met people who were self-centered or suffering abuse, whether at the hand of someone else or self-inflicted. She was neither. The few like her who were attractive and kind were in relationships.
Not that he’d been looking as Diego didn’t feel deserving of filling the void that was loneliness in his life. Sharing his baggage would no doubt drive her off. He’d cut himself off when it felt like too much, more than he could voice without embarrassing himself. Only it didn’t seem she’d judge him for it. He felt guilty as her eyes held back tears similar to his.
And then she shared her baggage that left him unable to speak once she finished. He drank water and heard Grace reminding him to picture the word in his mind to battle his stutter that had a habit of creeping up when emotions got the better of him. It was crazy to find someone who also knew what it was like to have someone die.
He took a deep breath, exhaling like a sigh before giving a response. ]
I’m… sorry. I think you found another jackass. Someone grouchy and hard to read.
[ Except he really wasn’t that hard to read when letting someone in. His emotions were on his sleeves around those he liked, and it was happening with Rey. Brown eyes that could turn dark with anger were soft. Timid. Fearful of not being enough. Diego quickly glanced away and cleared his throat.
He sat up, steeling himself. ]
I don’t know if I’d get you out. I’d stay inside and read too.
[ Yet his shoulders began to slump again as he questioned himself. Was he intentionally trying to sabotage meeting a kindred spirit? No, Diego hadn’t been someone different for Eudora and wouldn’t start now. He couldn’t save her but neither was he responsible for her death. Their relationship failed although his feelings had never changed. ]